Have you ever met someone who made you feel more seen than anyone ever has, who showed up fully and made the connection feel special — and then pulled away just as things were getting real?

If any of this sounds familiar…

  • They were warm, attentive, all in — and then something shifted and you couldn't figure out what

  • They pulled you close, then created distance — likely more than once
  • Their words and actions didn't match, yet somehow their actions show they really cared
  • When things were good, it was incredible. When they pulled back, it's like were a different person
  • You don't know if they're scared, losing interest, or just built differently — and the uncertainty is the hardest part

Then this Guide was made for you – whether you're still in it, just got out, or trying to make sense of the relationship months later.

You’ll understand:

  • 💣 Why the connection with an FA is so intense

  • 🌪️ What's really driving their confusing behaviours, and why the harder you try, the worse it gets
  • 🪞 How they run from themselves more than they run from you, and stop taking so much responsibility for the dynamic

  • 💔 Why FA breakups are so incredibly painful and hard to process

  • 🧶 Why it can be so hard to walk away or detach from an FA

  • 🧭 Get honest about where your FA is at the moment, and feel empowered to make an informed decision on the next step

13 in-depth lessons covering:

1. How FAs are made – difficult early experiences that shaped the way they are

2. No BS explanation of their infamous push and pull

3. Core wounds and fears quietly driving their romantic relationships

4. Deactivation strategies they use to create distance from their partners

5. Common triggers that send them into shutdown

6. Their dating history and what it reveals

7. Early warning signs of an FA so you can spot one faster next time

8. The trap of a self-aware avoidant and how to know they might be one

9. What FAs need to feel safe in relationships

10. How to assess if they are truly ready for a partnership

11. Understanding FA breakups (they're some of the most heartbreaking)

12. Stages FAs through after a breakup, and what they might do next

13. An intro to the anxious-avoidant dynamic

This guide is for you if:

  • You are dating or in a relationship with someone who runs hot and cold and you can't figure out what's going on
  • You've been broken up with someone you think could be an FA and can't find closure
  • They've come back and you don't know what to do about that
  • You keep attracting the same type of person and want to understand why 
  • You've been told "I love you but I can't do this" — and you won't find peace until you understand actually means